just some random thoughts... because while i'm sure that minute and MAYBE even interesting things have happened, i'm not sure i feel like writing about them. nothing terrible has happened to me, we had a breakin, but it wasn't too bad and we are ok. the volunteers in Thies had a much worse situation. one of them even got malaria afterwards. from that point of view, i haven't really had any "oh my god im in senegal how crazy/hard/awesome/life changing/etc" moments.
part of that is because i'm living at home with papa et belle maman, part of that is i'm in Dakar which is finally super modern and in some ways not like Africa at all (oh but it is, because it's big city Africa, which is a whole culture unto itself) and then part of that is just, well, it's me. I've lived in Africa, was born in Africa, and do the new/different place thing all the time. In truth? I feel like the quality of life is so difficult here that i'm not sure it'd lure me back for long. Cote d'Ivoire seems like a dreamland in some ways, even though it was hard there too. Its just little things. like the crappy unpaved roads. They aren't new or unusual to me, they just make my day to day existence a little more frustrating. And I guess that it's making me realize that, bottom line, I'm not really planning the rest of my life in the developing world. Still trying to put my finger on what exactly I love about Africa.... I guess that's part of why I came here-to figure that out.
I feel the answer coming to me sometimes when I'm riding in a taxi alone at night, feeling the coolness of the breeze in my hair and the freedom of going out on my own. I feel it when I'm in the ocean bobbing up and down perfectly on waves, watching the planes take off and looking back at the shore and thinking about this crazy crazy peninsula i've been living and breathing on. But so far, nothing more tangible. And my feelings for this place are as changeable as the ocean. Some days it is clear and I can see to the sand, the waves are strong but perfectly spaced, the current doesn't suck me into the rocks, and I can float and swim and be in balance and in harmony with my element, water. Other days I start to wonder if water really is my element, and I am in a fight with the ocean. We go to war and I try to ford the waves and not get knocked off my feet, no chance to relax and let the cool particles wash over me before the next wave is upon me, up my nose and down my throat and coughing no time to recover before diving below the next.
finally. i have been watching a lot of movies lately. i think this is in part my reactions to being away from theatre and having spent a lot of time around actors. but i pick up things that actors do in movies, that aren't part of their character. there's a little bit of Bridget Jones in Renée Zelwegger's character in Jerry Maguire. But Bridget Jones came well after--and so I conclude that it's mostly just a little Renée, not some Bridget. I noticed this as well with certain actors I know much better who were on a Sex and the City episode. I also am tending to recognize actors from random tv shows much more. Ie I'll see them on a tv show i watched online, flick on the tv onto Canal Plus for 10 seconds, see an actor, and immediately know its the same one. Might not remember their name, but i will for sure remember their face. same as ever I suppose, but i never paid attention to actors as much before.
other random detail; figured out my curiosity for english speakers at the beach and elsewhere. in Abidjan, if i saw anyone of my age and they were speaking english and i didn't know them, I was very curious. I went to the only english speaking school in town, so i went to school with like 99% of all white english speakers of my age. So it was unusual to see someone i didn't know. I guess that's why now I want to find out.
ok. time to talk to Brian, yay.
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